Uheaval in our home

330pm (shortly after we brought David home from the hospital) Carolina came home from school. She wasn't really feeling well and skipped soccer practice. She proceeds to tell me that Maialen had her music on loud after we left to go to the hospital and she put her ear buds on to listen to her music. When she took her ear buds off, Christianna was screaming bloody murder at her door!!!! Carolina said, "Maia, Christianna's crying!" Maia said, "Oh". Carolina went to take care of Christianna and Maia stayed in her room! While taking care of Christianna, Carolina found that the dogs had pooped in the kitchen and she told Maia to put the dogs in the kennel. Carolina got Christianna back to sleep and they were both done about the same time and they started thinking about how to clean up the mess (neither of the girls have experience with animals). Maia didn't know what to do because there was no paper towel in the kitchen. Carolina went and got paper towel from the bathroom (Shanndon is potty training, so there has been cleaner and paper towel in the bathroom for a week!). Maia didn't want to touch anything, so Carolina cleaned up the mess.
I was livid over hearing all this, but mostly, that Christianna was neglected! Here she is thrown with a babysitter for half the day, dealing with daddy having this big arm contraption, and chaos in the house and then she's left to scream bloody murder for a half hour! I scolded Carolina for having her ear buds on when I left them BOTH to watch the 3 sleeping kids in this emergency situation. She was upset, but understood what I was upset about and apologized! This is not the first time Maia has been spoken to about having her music up loud while the kids are sleeping. She has a computer that plays CDs, she has expensive ear buds, she has the most expensive IPOD! USE THEM!!!! The girls share a wall with the kids!
I called Toni (our community representative) and said I can't handle Maia's irresponsibility and selfishness any longer and that I needed her to leave my house! She called her boss to see what to do. Maia got home about 610pm and I started to talk to her. Toni called me back at 615pm and said that she needed to meet with us and try to mediate the situation, so we arranged for Toni to pick up Maia Friday night at 530pm from swimming practice and then come and talk with us. I get off the phone with Toni and continue to talk to Maia.
In my opinion, Maia didn't care about anything I had to say. Her excuse for not hearing Christianna was that she was emailing her parents and was just in her own world. When I talked to her about the not helping clean up the dog poop (when she's the one that wanted to "play with the dogs" while we were gone) was that she didn't know what to do and she didn't want to get her hands icky. When I told her about the playing the music loud and how we've talked to her about it several times, she said she didn't realize it was a problem. Monday, when I talked to her about wasting my and the personal trainers time for 15 minutes on Monday, her reply was, "oh yeah, we ran into April and got to talking". Her response to things was, "I live in a happy world, my life is just happiness, I try to please everyone and I do my best! I'm sorry for everything." We have a household of 7 people, NOT ONE!!!! After what I felt was wasting my time talking to Maia about our issues, I was then confident, that I could not live like this any longer. My decision to have her find a new home was solidified. Maia would stay the night and we'd have our meeting the next night.
Toni and Maia came about 7pm, we put the kids to bed while Toni spoke with Carolina privately and then met as a family. Toni started out by asking, "has anything changed since yesterday?" My response was, "after speaking with Maia the last night and getting nothing but excuses, I was now confident in my decision that she needed to leave our house." So Maia stayed the night, and packed her luggage this morning. She's going to spend the night at her friends house tonight, as they are going to the ROTC ball and then tomorrow Toni will come pick up Maia and her luggage and she'll spend the night at Toni's and then she'll go to her new home.
Toni called today, Maia has a choice of two families to go to. They will meet Sunday afternoon with the famlies and Maia will decide.
I spoke with Carolina about her feelings. She realizes it is our house and our decision. She understands everything I have to say about the situation and see postives with it. She's at peace with it and it's done.
I feel completely guilty, sad, and like a complete failure! However, I think I'm at peace with it and in all honesty, I'm relieved!!!