Pajamas

For the last 8 weeks-since November 20 when I had my surgery-if I've worn clothes at all, it's mainly been pajamas/tshirts/sports bras and underwear. Now it's time to get back to real life. This week I have had to "get dressed for real" everyday. When I look in my closet for what I'm going to wear, I'm faced with a big dilemma!!! One side of my brain says, " I want to wear this big comfy frumpy sweatshirt (or something of that nature)". The other side says "I just spent $14,000 that I'm going to be paying onthe rest of my natural born life and spent 8 weeks with many more to go in complete misery-show off!" So, this week I have been paying close attention to what I've been wearing. I've been wearing shorter shirts that shows the "flat" of my tummy and don't cover up the zipper and butt. The shirts are tighter too, to show off the "flatness". These things are not my style! They are not comfortable! I don't feel I can lounge around in them. I come home and immediately STRIP and put on a PJs or big 3X shirt! Isn't wearing big comfy clothes associated with shame and wanting to cover things up and hide things? I don't want to hide things, but I do like big loose clothes?! UGH! So what's everyone's opinions? Do I sacrifice comfort for trying to look better? (David has certainly liked my "looking good" efforts-which makes me want to do it more-but-it's not comfortable!) Is it just something I need to get used too? Will I eventually feel this is my style? Will I eventually like the clothes? If that's the case, I think I could stick it out, I've done all this misery so far?! Or do I give up and say, hey this is me and wear the big oversized 1,2,3 X clothes on a size 6 body? Heck, it's nearly to the point that my drawstring on my sweats hang to my knees I have to pull them so tight to tie them to fit me. But they are so comfy!!!!!!!!!!!!
You know what's really suprising? My pants and jeans-although they removed 5 lbs of skin-are the exact same size. Quite disappointing really! The difference is before they had a big bulge in tummy and now they're flat! So...what should I do?